I entertained the idea of being a Personal Trainer for a few months. The whole time, though, I couldn't help but feel, "this isn't me." The major problem I couldn't get around was that I just didn't want to be a Personal Trainer. It sounds simple when put into those words, but I couldn't fully admit it until recently.
I was on the right track. Personal Training overlapped with what I want in a career in several ways. It pertains to my interests (fitness, etc), would allow me to be my own boss, and would give me an avenue to help others. But that's where the Pros end and the Cons begin. The act of personal training itself (which I tried exactly one time), just isn't that enjoyable to me.
So I visited my old friends Depression, Apathy, and Seclusion for a while. I knew the types of things I enjoyed doing (see my previous post regarding "Path Theory"), but I just couldn't see a singular path that I would want to travel and that would take me to a desirable place. I pursued my interests half-assedly and spent the rest of my ample time sleeping, eating, drinking, and playing video games. Some of it was fun, but mostly I hated myself.
Coming off my worst binge in years, I reached a low. I wouldn't say it was a "new low" or a "lowest low," but it was a familiar low. I had been drinking to the point of blackout and eating the junkiest foods I could find for four days straight, right before New Years. I had a miserable hangover that lasted several days and brought anxiety with it.
Luckily, I can speak openly about these types of things with my friend Steve of GriffGlass.com. We had a long conversation one night, probably 12/28/15, and when we hung up I felt optimistic but still physically terrible. But I stayed with the optimistic thoughts. Whenever Steve and I talk about self-improvement, the future, or anything grand in scope, really, I quote podcasts that I listen to. I listen to podcasts all day, every day at work. I started feeling appreciative for the mindless work I do that allows me to listen to podcasts.
That's when it hit me. I'm lucky because I can listen to podcasts without taking any time out of my day. Most people can't. If I could combine podcasts with an activity that people want to do, I can give them an opportunity to hear the type of content that has changed me for the better. So I thought of a Yoga + Podcast event.
Since then, my mind has had a direction in which to aim its creativity. And it's been good. I took a page out of Steve's book and decided to immediately invest in my idea:
So now I'm gonna try and say goodbye to Depression, Apathy, and Seclusion for a bit. I've got an idea to throw my energy into. Steve will be here soon. I'm going to try and see where this path goes.